This post is dedicated to my Blue Butterfly, a soul of mine who has been a dear friend for nearly a decade. It is very strange how these kinds of relationships work, I think the old adage goes..."You think you know somebody!" In this case, I keep discovering somebody who I thought I knew as friend, who turned out to be butterfly and is still a dear friend.
This particular session went through a series of run throughs in my brain. I wasn't sure what I was going to get, but he told me he would bring a surprise. This particular human has a fondness for "The Last Unicorn" film and gifted me with the poet of the film, the Blue Butterfly limited edition pin. That, my friends is a true indicator of love.
He arrived at my door and we went upstairs. I knew I wanted the session to be playful, colorful, magical with a touch of seductive indulgence via blue icing-ed cupcakes (We'll get to those in a minute). I had a plan for play and if you are reading this wondering about how this is Domination, I'll explain a bit further on why I ensure fantasy, tenderness, sweet things and also an embrace of innocence are all paramount to my practice.
We went upstairs and he said, "I have a costume Mx. May I put it on?" His breathing was quick and excited. I had seen him like this before as we met in the desert in the dust while he was carrying a rather large worm puppet and going on and on about swing dancing-one of my other deep loves and past times. He began to open his suitcase, I turned around and tapped my foot waiting for him to complete his costume change. "Ready!" he said with so much joy, you'd have thought he had won a trip to Disneyland.
I turned around and there he was, a blue butterfly, wings and all with little goggles on a top hat wearing nothing but a vest and blue underwear on his body. The largest piece of it all was the wings and I was joyous that he knew just how to please my heart by bringing a butterfly, THE butterfly to my Lighthouse. We played.
We danced together and I instructed him on just how to be a butterfly. "Flap your wings." "Turn around." "Move slower...faster....go down...go up." "Excellent Work Butterfly." "Where's your proboscis, did you forget your proboscis?" "Not yet." "Wings down." Perhaps you had to be there, but suffice it to say, being able to instruct THE Blue Butterfly was a dream come true for me. This darling really knows me and this is why I'm writing this blog post. I am not a common Domme with only black leather and latex pain induced fantasies (I don't think any Domme is ONLY that). I am a deep believer in fantasy, play and giving as a means to connect. Needless to say, he understood the assignment.
We played "Sweet Spot" which is a game in which we take anything that is sweet and delicious and I put it on various parts of my body with the instructions..."EAT" but don't you dare let your tongue go anywhere the 'Sweet Spot' isn't, if you do...you get punished. We played the game with the blue icing-ed cupcakes and he did very well being a Blue Butterfly himself, I assumed that he could only see and taste blue, so anything that wasn't that would be particularly disdainful. He was a very well behaved butterfly, so we moved to the Golden Room where the showers happen.
I sat my butterfly on the ground and had him watch me shower off all the blue icing, which is a trick because the oils from the icing required scrubbing and bubbling. I told my Blue Butterfly, only watching, no touching and monitored his proboscis accordingly. He was allowed to dry me and then we ended our session by reversing the transformation and he was himself again. A human being with a suitcase that I had known for years, yes. But who I continue knowing in other ways that I'm immensely grateful for.
I cannot begin to tell you what kind of trust there needs to be for a middle aged man to turn into a butterfly, but it's immense in its proportions to balance out the toxicity within the patriarchy and the pain that comes with not being able to find your own innocence while being in a male body in this society. People like me help, Dominatrixes help channel and hold space for the sweet things that come up in the psyche of those in pain. We love it. The pain and the release, the trust and the innocence. The joy and the wonder. We love it all.
I will leave with a poem by the Blue Butterfly from the film, "The Last Unicorn":
"Your name is a golden bell hung in my heart. I would break my body to pieces to call you once by your name."
And if that isn't Kinky....
Comments